J.P.'s Fantastic Blog Post about Symposium

 

"Symposium" is a funny word. If I were to be honest, I do not really know what it means, so let us consult the wonders of Google:

I find it particularly telling that I have attended two symposiums— one at the Miami Dade School of Science to present my cryptocurrency research, and one to discuss digital tools for disabilities— yet I did not know until now that "symposium" is Greek for "drink together."

Well, in our symposium, we did drink together: from the fountain of knowledge that is sharing vital information with each other.

Sorry, was that too cheesy? Too on-the-nose, forced, or cliché? I'm just being honest.

The topics of our symposium needed to be discussed. They included discourse on mental health and the societal perception of mental health. Oftentimes one hears of how mental health is stigmatized, underrepresented, and unprioritized, especially in a society focused on work and monetary profit. There seems little time for leisure as we all vie to take some sort of lead in the hierarchy. Unfortunately this struggle is made twofold when most of the struggle is not even trying to get ahead, but solely to subsist— to "just get by."⁽¹⁾ And you could sit here and debate me on whether this struggle is a "necessary evil" because there are too many people and some need to be at the top, or some other nefarious justification, but the fact remains that we, as a society, are not focusing on the repercussions of non-stop work.

The symposium kind-of explored these topics.

Slide taken from Group 1

There was something that irked me about the speech bubbles in the corners. The graphic designer in me loves the art and the rotated-placement of the graphics. But perhaps the side-effect of condensing such a nuanced topic has left me bewitched, bothered, and bewildered. Feel free to listen to the linked song. It has absolutely nothing to do with the matter at hand (aside from talking about mental anguish) but it may serve as pleasant background noise as I attempt to explain myself.

"Love yourself" and "you are enough" are, indeed, things to remember. ...but things are not so easy!

I hate to be a Debbie Downer, but these quotes do not help one in an unfortunate situation. I do not mean to downplay the importance of being positive. But there is more nuance than telling someone to love themself.

It's mostly a patriarchal thing.

I have a BMI of 15.8. I've always been a short, frail guy throughout my lifetime. What's more, I've always been nervous and worried, caring about the most minuscule of things within my life. This does not play well with the social expectation of a "man." Recently I told my father about my vaccination. I don't do well with needles, and I told him about how I took my girlfriend with me for moral support. This vulnerability elicited a sort of groan from him. "That's... J.P., come on." I know he knows me well, and he probably does not consciously say this because he wants to uphold the patriarchy, but I am still left with a feeling that I am not a "man." That there is something wrong with me. A weakness that must be shunned.

Many years ago, I went to my grandfather to tell him about how I'd been bullied by my classmates, and how it hurt me. I received a similar response along the lines of "toughen up!" Both my father and grandfather are and were wonderful people, respectively, and I do not mean to negate that. I only mean to call attention to how hard it can be to normalize mental health when half the population is expected to have the mental fortitude of titanium. (Please do not think I am invalidating women's struggle, either, or the LGBT struggle. Everyone can receive undue scorn for expressing vulnerability.)

What is my point?

 Men need to be more open. The societal worry also stems from not wanting to appear effeminate. This is because some men who express effeminacy are mocked. They are mocked for no valid reason. But to first make progress in progressing mental health in society, we must take the leap— we must be the first ones to show vulnerability. This is how we normalize mental health.

I felt the symposium could have talked about this more.

Let's explore some Google search results for men and women crying.

Notice the "Funny Asian Man Crying" caption

Is it just me, or does the women screenshot appear more serious? Heartfelt, almost cooler?

The men screenshot seems comedic.

Why is this? Maybe it is not the fault of the images but instead my subconscious reception of these images.

My point is not that women have it easier than men. My point is that there is some societal grudge against men for expressing vulnerability. My fear is that this will not go away anytime soon. But perhaps we can hasten this by talking about it in our presentations. In my previous blog post, I talked about dealing with panic attacks. Unfortunately a few weeks after I wrote that post, I experienced a panic attack.

This is a meme that I pulled from the Internet, but I actually did disassociate and start panicking while I was driving on the turnpike. Nobody was hurt and nothing bad happened, so do not worry. But I am a man and I have frequent anxiety. I feel that we should normalize this because I am afraid to tell people.

The symposium offered some good information, but I also feel that the prevalence of bulimia nervosa in our society should have been discussed. For the uninitiated: this is a disorder characterized by a compulsive obsession with body-image, binge eating, and purging the food that was just ingested. 

Social media, television, peer pressure, familial pressure, and the like are causes of this.

MDC's Single Stop offers mental health counseling, and we should have also talked about this in the symposium. However, there is an undeniable taboo that comes with this. I cannot speak for the quality of MDC's Single Stop as I have never used it, but I have witnessed in my peers that they would not be caught dead using mental-health resources. They would not tell a soul as they believe it is shameful. Why are there societal implications behind using freely-made beneficial services? Why is it taboo?

The million-dollar question.

Maybe because there is some evolutionary advantage to appear strong. Maybe that is the root cause. 

I dunno.

 

It is okay to feel upset.

It is normal to feel upset.

Until next time,